In the movie, "The
Player" during a scene at a Hollywood studio executive meeting
Mr. Levy shows Reeve, the central character, how to pitch a potential
movie story. Levy holds out a newspaper, saying, "Here, read a headline,
any headline."
Reeve responds : "Um . . .'Immigrants Protest Budget
Cuts in Literacy Program.'"
Levy: "Human spirit overcoming economic adversity. Sounds
like Horatio Alger in and the barrio. You put in Jimmy Smits, you
got a sexy 'Stand and Deliver.' Next?"
Robert Kosberg, a Hollywood producer convinced a studio to make
the 1993 pets -gone-wrong movie "Man's Best Friend." His
pitch was "Jaws on Paws".
How quickly can you grab someone's attention? It is far more difficult
to write a one page summary than a ten page report. When putting
your words to paper (or computer), seize the power of spare, specific,
relevant details over volume of information.
Stories and sayings are the markers of meaning in our work and
social lives.
Use them. Here's some swift ways to "Say It Better"
in writing. Whether you are putting your thoughts down to send to
other or as speaking points, keep this checklist of tips to guide
you.
A. Be brief.
If your characterization is sufficiently short then others are more
likely to remember it and pass it along. Here are six successful
ways to be memorably brief:
1. Use a familiar word in a new way. You might even become more
well-known for labeling a trend. For example, futurist, Faith Popcorn,
predicted five years ago that people would want to be "cocooning"
in their home. She labeled the post September 11th feelings of anxiety
AtmosFear.
Create:
2. Alliteration: "Peak performance" and "high
tech/high touch."
3. Rhyme: "Jaws on Paws"
4. Repetition: "First things first", Steve Covey's
advice.
5. Puns: Tongue Fu!, is the punning title of a book by Sam Horn,
you can find in Kare's Top 20 Favorite Books
6. An unexpected turn of phrase: To make a deeper connection with
people upon first meeting, I suggest "going slow to go fast."
B. Make favorable comparisons with familiar objects
When people in your work world are immersed in their jargon, your
remarks can stand out when you make a comparison with a well-liked
product, person or situation from outside your profession or industry.
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Example: At the high stakes
Morgan Stanley Healthcare conference, venture capitalists hear 20-minute
talks by CEOs of start-ups and public companies who seek funding
or favorable stock analysts' reporters. The tension is high and
the schedule is packed. Most presenters speak fast, using a mix
of highly technical scientific and finance language.
My client, the CEO from bio-tech company, Amgen, walked past the
podium to the center of the stage, pulled up one suit and shirt
sleeve to bare his raised forearm. He opened his talk, saying, "You
will feel the effects of this medical patch faster than it takes
a Porsche to go from zero to 90. "
C. Hijack a familiar slogan to use in a new way.
After a company has spent millions to make a slick slogan well-known,
twist it in a new direction for your intended meaning.
Example: Redwood Hospital in Northern California used this billboard
variation of the popular milk slogan to ask for blood donations:
"Got blood?"
D. Anchor your suggestion in a relevant story
To pull people into hearing and remembering your view, set it up
with a brief anecdote.
Example: What if you wanted to indicate that people are problem
solving too narrow a perspective? Consider offering this story first:
There is an old joke in Soviet Russia about a guard at the factory
gate who at the end of every day saw a worker walking out with a
wheelbarrow full of straw.
Every day he thoroughly searched the contents of the wheelbarrow,
but never found anything but straw. One day he asked the worker:
"What do you gain by taking home all that straw?" "The
wheelbarrows."
E. Bungle your translation to bring humor
If you are with a worldly group, offer your variation of a well-known
expression in a foreign language. Change a single letter and provide
a definition for the new expression.
Share these rules and your expression with your colleagues and
ask for their contribution. New York magazine held such
a contest in 2001.
Here are some of the winning contributions:
HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS: Can you drive a French motorcycle?
IDIOS AMIGOS: We're wild and crazy guys!
RESPONDEZ S'IL VOUS PLAID: Honk if you're Scottish.
POSH MORTEM: Death styles of the rich and famous.
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ALOHA OY: Love; greetings;
farewell; from such a pain you would never know.
VISA LA FRANCE: Don't leave your chateau without it.
VENI, VIDI, VELCRO: I came, I saw, I stuck around.
ZITGEIST: The Clearasil doesn't quite cover it up.
F. Coat your truth in the softening power of humor
So much American life has been fast-paced and tense. Consider opening
a meeting with mock-serious inspiration or admonition, then grinning.
You'll find true life, Dilbert-like examples everywhere which you
can keep for your dry humored use.
Here are some of my favorites, gathered by Accountemps this year:
What I need is a list of specific unknown problems we will encounter."
(Lykes Lines Shipping)
This project is so important, we can't let things that are more
important interfere with it."
(Advertising/Marketing manager, United Parcel Service)
We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not
going to discuss it with the employees.
(Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)
G. Encapsulate a Situation
How briefly can you tell a story?
Example: In late 2002 a book by Jenny Lee will be released, entitled:
I Do. I Did, Now What?: One Woman's Musings on Married Life, which
the agent characterized thusly (after getting our attention): "a
rant that (almost despite itself) ends up as a celebration of marriage."
Financial analyst, Alan Parisse shared this perhaps apocryphal
newspaper advertisement with me: "For sale. Infant shoes. Never
used."
Whatever you are writing, finish by reviewing it to consider:
- What you can eliminate to give impact to that which remains
- Whether your tone and style is clear and in keeping with your
content
- How you want others to summarize your thoughts when they tell
others
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Kare Anderson is the founder of the Say It Better
Center, located in Sausalito, CA. She can be reached via email at
kare@sayitbetter.com. |
